One of the goals of every parent is to raise children with good character, who will be successful in everything they do in life. But in reality being a person with good character and values can be challenging, especially in a society that rewards the opposite. The older our children get, the more daunting the task becomes, as we have to compete with distractions from the TV, social media and other peers. It may be no surprise, then, that the critical time to lay the groundwork for building character is in early childhood. As we know, early childhood experiences can strongly impact who we become.

The prophet (salalaahu alaihi wasallam) was known to be a man of good character and was even given nick names like Al- Amin (the faithful) and Al-Siddiq (the truthful). Although his enemies  opposed everything he preached, they still referred to him by these names.  This goes to show that good character is the most important asset you can have, because it builds trust. It was for this reason (the prophet’s good character) that many of the Quraish accepted Islam as they knew he was a man that only spoke the truth.

So, keeping this in mind, how can we add character building into our routines?  

• Talking explicitly about our values help our children develop them. Take advantage of every opportunity you can find to talk to your children about the characteristics that are loved by Allah such as patience, honesty, justice, humility, kindness and a good sense of humor. I have made my kids this ABC Character Building Flash Cards in an effort to get the discussion started and when I find the opportunity I can refer back to the flashcards. Here is an  ABC Character Building poster for those who prefer this format to be able to display on the walls for a constant reminder.
  
• Whether it’s of yourself when you were their age or of the sahaabah and the prophets, sharing stories help children develop empathy. As an idea, you can tell the story of courage of young Ali ibn Abee Taalib (radiyallaahu anhu) who was around 10 years old when he accepted Islam and when the prophet (sallalahu alaihi wasallam) invited their family members to accept Islam it was only young Ali who stood up in front of his uncles and pledged his support.

• Incorporate Activities that help build character. Teach responsibility by having children tidy up their toys after themselves, set the table, or put dirty dishes in the dishwasher (or in my case with my  2 and 3 year old to take clean dishes out of the dishwasher). Teach kindness by donating toys, clothes or food to the less fortunate with your kids. Teach empathy by taking a trip to the local food bank or nursing home.

Character building takes a lifetime to shape and as I have mentioned before (in teaching toddlers about Islam), we have to remember that first and foremost, we have to model the desired traits ourselves.  If we want to teach our kids that they should not lie, we should not be caught lying. If we want our kids to appreciate everything they have, we should appreciate them and everything they do as well as appreciate everything we have. If we want our kids to forgive others, we should be forgiving of their mistakes/accidents and if we want them to be confident in their abilities we should show them how confident we are in our abilities.